Saturday, February 24, 2007

tHe gOod, thE bAd aNd tHe uGLy...

dear jess,

there are several paths we need to choose from. or if we're not so lucky, we're forced to choose from. alot of times we wonder what are we here for, and if our meager existance has been accounted for.

some days i feel like i live in the bronx, not that ive ever been there to make a comparison. after a few months of my unknown perpetrator trying to enter my car, ruebens car gets robbed into, leaving the car window smashed. all because he had parked a few doors down. with less than 3 hours of sleep i had to meet mark teh, who was sweet with that unassuming grace i mentioned.

so, as i was saying. paths. having met two people in the arts scene my brain has been left working overtime. i suppose i couldnt have been so naive to expect that meeting passionate people would have not affected me in the least bit? but alas, i suppose i did.

and now im left to ponder with one too many things. one too many things that have questioned what im doing and left me to wonder if its right, wrong or even necessary.

for all the people who thrive to make the world better, more meaningful, something that leaves audiences to think, there's ten others to make the world worse.

do you reckon that we are people living mundane lives unaccounted for? shouldnt everyone be passionate about at least one thing? i remember once at bible study someone said that the mundanity is part of a normal life and that something along the lines of God wanting us to just live that way as long as we are good christians.
shouldnt we strive for more?

i guess at some point last year, all i wanted to do was stay in bed. and stay there and away from people as long as i could. talented and "great" people made me afraid. afraid that in that i would reveal my own weaknesses.

talent is something i cant fix, but my fear is.

come with me on this journey? and when you get there you can tell me it was all worth while? and ill do the same for you.

yours,
jess

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