cOLLecTiVe CoNciOusnEsS

dear me,

you always believe that you should write only when you are inspired. Be it a sudden urge to say something that philosophically moves you or a stupid thought. But sometimes the inspiration stops. And you will not succumbed to that of what other writers do when they dictate their, “I was at school at 9 and had lunch at 12.” Even if my life was as boring as that, and it is, I never would do it.

Someone once told me that my letters to you were honest, how funny I found it to be. Whilst there were traces of honesty in it, it was always masked so that no one would fully understand it, or at least I would be led to think that.

Everyone thinks about death at one point or another. Their own that is. Perhaps its self pity or fear, but most likely narcissism, as our life flashes. It is isn’t it? Living, like writting, seems to make sense only if someone read it. We write with the proud security that people are interested in what we have to say. That someone actually cared that we were awake at 9 and having lunch at 12.

Maybe that’s also the same reason why we put all our energies and hope into getting hitch and married like it was the most important thing in the world.

Flashes of thought at the meeting of our maker, we think "did I get to outlive my dreams or have I done enough with my youth and most of all did I leave a mark to the world?" "Did I inspire anyone.?"

Do you want to know how to please someone? Get their ego bloated till they burst at the seams? Tell them they’ve inspired you. Heck, sometimes they even believe that without anyone acknowledging it. Oh she’s acting because of me, studying law because of me.

I think it was part of a movie. The secret to courting that girl is letting her talk about herself. It always works.

It always has and will be the big M-E. The fall of MEn, will be our very own self.

yours, of course,

me